In Defense of Nelly Furtado, Sort of.

So I live in the ghetto, right? Once upon a time, I realized that there was a public access channel on tv that would show music videos from The Box. The idea of The Box was that people called in and requested what they wanted to see, and in my neighborhood, people wanted to see 3LW, Ja Rule, Lil' Kim. Oh! And Ludacris. Who'd have thought this last guy was gonna appear on SVU and on an Oscar-winning movie?!

One day, they added this video by Nelly Furtado. "I'm Like a Bird". I thought the video concept was stupid. I also thought the lyrics were kinda dumb. I know griping about pop song lyrics is like saying that the subway is dirty. But still.

"I'm Like a Bird" has never been my favorite song, but I heard other positive things about this girl, so I bought her album. I really love Whoa, Nelly! But I thought people were gonna forget about her. But about 6 months, maybe a year later, I can't remember, people took notice of the same stupid song that I didn't dig. It always seems to work out that way, doesn't it? Anyway, somehow she got really famous. I don't get it, to be honest, why some people get to be famous and others don't.

I'm really shocked by how much buzz this album is making! It seems like every blog I've read in the past couple of months has been going all "OMAGAWDNELLYRULES!" It's not a bad thing, it's just that blogs and the rest of the world tend to have dissenting opinions but on this occasion... they share this same love. I didn't know it was cool to love Nelly Furtado. I thought we all thought she had an annoying voice. I guess that's what happens when Canada is supposed to be the "it" thing. Is Celine Dion next?

But I'm still wondering about all this buzz. First, are the rest of the kids acting like Nelly's the coolest pop star since Kelly Clarkson to prove they're not being ironic and well-rounded music fans? Second, did Nelly's people get smart with their marketing of Nelly the product and send out links of mp3s for them to post on their blogs? I'm in a handful of mailing lists and they write these emails specifically for bloggers. They go, "HEY! Here's a sexy new track by _____. Post it up on your blog and send us back the link as proof! It'll make YOU that much sexier!" I've been worrying a lot lately about how everything seems to be a product that's being marketed to me, and how I need to get away from this trap. Sigh.

Ugh, this was supposed to be a review of Nelly's new album, Loose. It helped that I had low expectations of it, because I ended up liking it and going, "Hey, it wasn't that bad." I mean Steve said it's awful, and I can't believe he'd say something like that after the release of The Hardest Way to Make an Easy Living. Or maybe I can. Steve has been open in expressing his disdain for dance music. In turn, I may be digging this album a lot because I'm on this dance music trip. Like I've been trying to download the DJ-Kicks that Tiga did; I only recently looked at the tracklist and, in theory, it sounds like it's gonna be AMAZING. But I've having trouble finding a victim from whom to download.

BACK TO LOOSE. It's sort of a stupid album to listen to at home while doing your homework. It's more of an album you'd listen to when no one's home and you get to shout and dance all by yourself. Or it's good for what I did, which is to listen to the album you take the train and feel like you all that. I'm glad this album is all flashy and shit because I can tell the lyrics aren't amazing. I actually think that's the weakest part of the album. I mean, what the hell is that "Promiscuous" business? I can't believe this is the first single in the US.

This album is not like the first and greatest of her albums, but it's pretty good. We'll see how well it ages. I guess I shouldn't talk about the Chris Martin duet cos it's getting pulled off the album. Supposedly, his label got pissy about it. That's retarded because he's done plenty of things with pop people. Actually, I can think of him writing a song for Jamelia, that's pretty much it. I don't know, I just think it's very inconsiderate of the label if the rumors about this are true. I mean, all that money down the drain. And imagine all the money they might NOT get! I think. I'm not entirely sure how things happen in the music industry happen in a monetary sense, other than the fact that music labels don't know how to run themselves. Then again, it's pocket change for them.

Honestly, I can't really remember how this Chris Martin track goes. It's called "All Good Things (Come to an End)". It wasn't anything amazing. BUT! The Juanes track, "Te busqué", is pretty good! Especially considering that every single he's done between "Mala gente" and "La camisa negra" has been pretty icky. The latter had so-so parts, too, it was a weird single to put out. And I may or may not have liked some of the singles released in between those two, but by the way I'm blocking all memory of it, probably not. So "Te busqué" might be the strongest Juanes track we've had in a whiiiiile. I still think it's a dumb habit of Latino artists to do their songs in both English and Spanish. I think Fijación oral has shown that an album completely in Spanish can be plenty popular. Think about it. If I was like this 14-year-old girl, I'd feel cheated that I paid $14.99 for this album and got what, 10 real tracks instead of 11 like I originally thought.

I think it's interesting that Nelly's performing in Spanish, too. I can name a number of Italian people who perform in Spanish to widen their appeal, and I guess Nelly is doing the same. Yes, I know she's Portuguese, but it's the same idea, I guess: make the kids "happy" and cash in on their joy. Do I sound too cynical? Let's not lie to ourselves, with their track records, major labels wanna make as much money at once as possible.

I think this album is great in theory and only good in execution. A lot of the tracks, although they might feel awesome in the clubs, have a same-y feel when you've just got the CD on at home. I did liked the little R&B bit that Nelly does on "Showtime". It's a nice break in the album after all that THUMP THUMP THUMP. Is it baby-makin' music? It's pretty chill. Hope they release this as a single.

My favorite song in the entire album is "No hay igual". It's got one of those choruses that's not even very musical, but it gets into your head to the point you want to bash it into a wall if you can't hear the song again and shout along to the words. The beat is really cool, too.

I feel very odd about Timbaland's work on Loose. He's past his prime, isn't he? I don't know what work he's done recently other than Utada Hikaru's Exodus, and I have to say, at times, I got Exodus vibes on some of these Nelly tracks. And obviously I don't mean the vocals or whatever, but just the beats and the overall production. Utada also went through this whole sleek urban schtick to crossover into the American market, and even though I still listen to the album, I don't think it was amazing. I'd have to say that Loose is comparable, except for "Te busqué", which sounds more Juanes-y, haha.

One cool feature about the album is that it has a lot of Nelly's studio chatter before or after the songs. Considering how over-the-top some of the production can get, it's nice to hear this. It gives it more of a first-draft feel that works well against the club-ready music.

I don't know dudes. I think it's more of a fans-only album, except her fans like her pop schtuff and will probably be all like "Ew what the fuck", unless they "get" Nelly and then they're all like, "Oh em gee! I like edgy new Nelly!!!" How about this: it's best it stay in clubs, parties, and/or walks around the city where you can strut around looking all badass. Nelly's work, to date, has been a bit hit-or-miss for the more casual fans, but I don't doubt she's got the best intentions and really does want to keep things interesting. I find that honorable, and I welcome this change.